Gender Bender
by BrainlessBumblehead
Summary: What I think the Breakfast club would have been like with the genders switched, AllisonAl, BenderBen nickname for girl named Benita, ClaireClark, AndyAlex, BrianBrianna, Principle Vernon I think that’s his name : Principle Johnson, Janitor Johnson: Ja
1. The First Hour

Switcheroo:

The First Hour

Summary: What I think the Breakfast club would have been like with the genders switched, Allison: Al, Bender: Ben (nickname for girl named Benita), Claire: Clark, Andy: Alex, Brian: Brianna, Principle Vernon (I think thats his name) : Principle Johnson, Janitor Johnson: Janitor Vernon.

Disclaimer: I do not own the Breakfast Club or any of its characters, however I might use a few insults and comebacks from the movie. Personally I wished I owned John Bender but someone made up the stupid rule that you cant always get what you wish for and I have a message for them (though they are probably dead) screw you, you ruined a lot of peoples lives so if u haven't already DROP DEAD POOP HEAD!

Authors note: Now normally I don't put my stories on FanFic because I personally think I have 0 writing talent but my 2 best friends wont stop talking about their friggin stories so I thought I'd give it a shot, this is my first story on FanFic so please be gentle (I'm talking 2 u midget).

Quote from love him, O yes I do,

He's for me, not for you,

And if by chance you take my place,

I'll take my fist and smash your face!

_She's a rebel  
shes a saint  
shes the salt of the earth  
and shes dangerous  
shes a rebel  
vigilante  
missing link on the brink  
of distruction_

From chicago  
to toronto  
shes the one that they  
call old whatsername  
shes the symbol  
of resistance  
and shes holding on my heart  
like a hand grenade  
is she thinking  
what im thinking?  
is she the mother of all bombs?

gonna detonate  
is she trouble  
like im trouble  
make it a double

- She's a rebel, Green Day

The First Hour

Four teenagers were quietly (for now) sitting at their own separate tables in the silent library except for Clark and Alex who were sitting together because preps and jocks just had to stick together when put with a nerd and a pothead.

BAM! The door swung open as a girl in worn, holey jeans, black chucks, a leather jacket, and a black shirt that said "I'm an angel honestly. The Horns are just there to keep my halo up". She casually strolled in like she had been here many times before, and she had, her hands in her pocket and Green Days "Minority" blasting out of the headphones around her neck. She stopped in front of Clark, bent down to his eye level and blew a big bubble from the gum in her mouth, and it grew almost as big as their heads and she put her fingers up to it and popped it.

"THE HELL" he yelled as he tried to pull the blue (cotton candy bubbleyum) stickiness off of his what most thought gorgeous face.

The girl smirked then hopped up on the table and walked across all of them until she came back to the one behind Clark and Alex. This everyone knew was Johanna Bendita who was called Ben for short the worst miscreant to ever set foot in Sherman High school. Both rolled their eyes Alex muttered "Show off", and stood up to take her jacket off and put it on the back of her chair so it showed everyone the "captain" patch on it. Brianna started at it admiringly before realizing what she was doing and looked straight ahead before anyone could notice.

The door banged open once more and principle Johnson and Janitor Vernon walked in. Johnson smiling at the teens and Vernon glared at them as if he wanted to smack all of them around with the mop he was clutching co dearly to. They walked to the front of the room and stood facing the detentionee's.

"Well students I trust you all know why your here and are sorry for whatever you have done", Johnson started.

Eat my pantaloons, Ben muttered as Johnson glanced at her. Vernon heard her and started walking forward mop held protectively out in front of him. On seeing his approach Ben sent him a glare so fierce it was as if hell had jumped up into her eyes. Vernon hesitated then kept forward upon seeing the blue gum that once held its home on Clarks face now on the floor.

"Ahem", Johnson coughed now realizing that if he didn't do anything there would be a full fledged war in a matter of seconds. "Mr. Vernon could you please come back up here". Vernon grunted then obliged to his request walking backwards not letting Ben out of his sight as she smirked and cussed him out under her breath.

"Now students Mr. Vernon will be watching over you as I have some important business to attend to", Johnson said as all the students groaned except for Brianna who stared intently at Principle Johnson and Al who just stared out the window his eyes unfocused.

As soon as the Adults left Alex burst out "I its not fair Vernon's like the biggest nerd ever"!

"Second Biggest", said Ben looking at Brianna who blushed and pushed her scotched-taped glasses up higher on her nose.

"Leave her alone Johanna Bendita you aren't any higher up in social status!" Alex barked giving Ben a smirk almost identical to the previous one.

"Oh I think I just started crying inside, besides you can't talk, if you became any more boyish your imp-like friends will start asking you out"

"At least I have friends"! Alex said jumping up.

"Yeah cause everyone's dream is to hang out with people who start crying over not having time to put makeup on and breaking a heel on their shoe", Ben said standing up to match her.

"Shut up punk".

"Don't tell ME to shut up prep"

"God just SHUT UP"

"No YOU shut up"

"You"

"You"

"You"

"You ya stupid prat"

"Excuse me but maybe everyone should stop talking or Mr. Vernon will get angry, and shut up isn't very nice to say to someone", came the timid voice of Brianna.

"SHUT UP" both girls yelled as they continued their argument and didn't even notice when Clark got up and started walking to the door that led to the principles office until………….

"Mr. Johnson before you go could you come in here please", He said and then casually walked back to his seat.

"Yes kids",he said as he walked in closely followed by Vernon.

"First of all" Ben jumped up (upon Clark's breakup of their argument Alex and Ben had leaped back in to their seats) "We are not _kids_ but pre-adults, well some of us". As she looked at Clark saying that last part who glanced at her then watched the window trying to see what Al was so interested in. "Second of all nothing is wrong Clarky here is just being a stupid git".

Please watch your language miss Bendita, Johnson said, then he looked at Clark and said Is this true mister Kent (I know Im copying off of smallville but I love that show and that name).

"Well actually sir-"he started but a swift kick from both Ben and Alex caused his story to take a different face"We just wanted to tell you thaaaat we will………….miss you while you're gone? Yeah that's it that's what I wanted".

"Well…..okay be good for Mr. Vernon while I'm gone".

"We will", everyone except Ben and Al chorused. Al just stared into space and Ben rolled her eyes and when Johnson turned around she flicked him and Vernon off and Vernon being the childish wanker he is stuck his tongue out at her.

Both adults looked at all of them suspiciously but then shrugged and went back out of the room. As soon as they left an uproar filled the large space.

"What in the bloody hell did you do that for you stupid asshole" Alex yelled.

"Wow who knew she-man could talk so dirty", Ben said trying not to laugh and kill Clark at the same time.

"Kiss my ass butthole".

"Thanks but I'm not really like that".

"That's….not………….what..I……..meant..." Alex stuttered her anger growing with each word.

"I did what I did because you and Ben wouldn't shut up and he probably would have come in hear anyway with you two baboons attacking each other". Clark said cutting off a soon-to-be rematch between Ben and Alex.

"Not cool man", Al snored out, "No one rats out their own, that's low". Everyone stared at him as he returned to the window.

"See rich boy you did something so shitty that you got the burn out to talk", a voice said.

"Who said that", said a now angry Clark and as he spun around to look a giant spit ball hit the side of his face. Now a bystander would have seen Ben expertly put a straw back into her pocket without anyone noticing. "Who in the seven hells did THAT".

"I think we should just drop it it's already over with and none of us can change that", Brianna piped up.

The geeks right we should just chill out and try to deal with Vile Vernon. Ben said.

"I'm not a geek just because I wear glasses, I'm smart, and I choose studying over music and a sport doesn't make me one", Brianna said finally getting fed up with being called that.

Ben got up, walked over to Brianna's table, grabbed her face in her hands looked her in the eye, "Whateva", then without another word she turned and went back to her seat.

"Ugh how much longer could we possibly have left", Alex said as she looked up at the clock, "WHAT we have only been here for one hour! What the F kinda world is this".

"Awww is little sporty gonna cry", Clark teased.

"I must be on drugs because I actually agree with her it's only been and hour and already I'm as bored as a dumb kid in an academic decathlon", Ben said her mouth hanging open.

"By the end of today I am soooooo gonna kill all of you", Al mumbled loud enough for only Brianna to hear.

"Eeep I can't die yet I have not even begun my rise in political status", She shrieked. Everyone else just rolled their eyes and silently agreed, it was going to be a veeery long day.

**END O' CHAP 1**

**Just a fun fact the character Ben is based on me, my friend Katie, and my friend Sam. I will try to write the next chap soon but I am slow at everything I do so it might take a while. Please review and no flame well nvm I don't give you all have your opinions and I want to hear them.**


	2. Hahahahahahahaha

Gender Bender: Hahahahahahahaha (last chapter it said Switcheroo, that was a name I was considering calling this story and didn't realize it was on there)

Chapter 2

Summary: What I think the Breakfast club would have been like with the genders switched, Allison: Al, Bender: Ben (nickname for girl named Benita), Claire: Clark, Andy: Alex, Brian: Brianna, Principle Vernon (I think that's his name) : Principle Johnson, Janitor Johnson: Janitor Vernon.

Disclaimer: Are you kidding? After I just copy and pasted the summery from my first chap I am way too friggin tired to do it again for the disclaimer. You want it? Go back to the first chapter…………………………………………..O fine since you wont do it I'll just go on and say it ya lazy butt, sighI do not and unfortunately never will own the Breakfast club or any of its characters no matter how cool Bender and Allison are, HAPPY NOW?

Authors Note: Sorry it took so long for this chapter butt first my computer that was as old as Dumbledore got even older and slower (fortunately we don't have that problem with Dumbly) so then we called Dell and ordered a new one, so two days later we got it but those dumb computer people didn't put the monitor in the box with everything else. So we called them and my mom yelled at them for an hour and five days later we got it. Then it took two days to get everything set up and I had to try and understand why the computer kept telling me a website wanted to send me a cookie (don't ask). So after I figured that out I wanted to watch the Breakfast Club again so I could have more ideas for my story but my brother left it at his loser friends house. And when I finally got it back my internet stopped working. Is this a sign that I cant write and should stop my efforts now? Whatever. SO anyway sorry for the long wait my bad. As they say on stage when you literally _Break A Leg, _On with the show! Oh and save the Earth it's the only place with chocolate.

Another quote from goodquotes .com: Whoever said anthing is possible never tried slamming a revolving door.

_What day is it_

_And in what month_

_This clock never seemed so alive_

_I cant keep up_

_and I cant back down_

_I've been losing so much time_

_cause its you and meand all of the people _

_with nothing to do_

_nothing to lose_

_and its you and me and all of the people_

_And I dont know why_

_I cant keep my eyes off of you_

_all of the things I want to say_

_just arent coming out right_

_I'm tripping inwards_

_you got my head spinning_

_I dont know where to go from here_

_cause its you and meand all of the people _

_with nothing to do_

_nothing to prove_

_and its you and me and all of the people_

_And I dont know why_

_I cant keep my eyes off of you_

-You and Me, Lifehouse

"Ben sit down you weirdo", hissed Alex at the troublemaking teen who was busy taking out the screws from the door (earlier Vernon told them the door was to remain open)leading to the principles office. The annoyingly funny thing was she was doing this after she had taken out the screws from the chair that Vernon was going to be sitting on in a few minuets.

"You laugh at me because I am strange but I laugh at you because you are stupid", chanted Ben trying to start the what felt like fiftieth argue between her and Alex.

"Ugh why don't you just be normal for once", Clark said trying to keep a straight face.

"It's not my fault I was born like this". Ben said almost finishing with the door.

"Aww don't think of yourself as an ugly person, just a beautiful monkey" came the answer.

"I love you too pretty boy".

The sudden footsteps of the janitor came echoing down the hall. Ben finally got tired of trying to unscrew the door and started bashing it with a hammer she had taken from Vernon when he was doing something stupid and futile. The door slammed shut as soon as Ben made it back to her seat.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF MR. CLEAN IS GOING ON HERE!"(does that make sense?) Vernon bellowed as he ran at the door, tried to stop at it but couldn't, and smacked his face on it possibly making it uglier.

He opened it with a flushed face and stared with his bitter eyes at the students and when his gaze stopped on Ben- who at the time was plotting how to escape- and his eyes got even smaller.

"Alright Ben, hand over the screws", he said with gritted, yellow, cavity-filled, teeth.

"What screws Emperor Clorox", came her leering answer," The only screws I see sir, are the ones inside your head".Vernon opened his mouth, closed it, and turned to Brianna. Oh hell Ben thought now I'm going down. Note to self: kill the dweeb later if she spills.

"Miss Brianna, you have such a good clean permanent record", He said trying to make his voice silky-ish, "now I would hate to have to tell Principle Johnson that it was YOU who took the screws off the door that I said was to remain open". There was a small eep from Brianna who was staring straight ahead and sweating like an elephant trying to climb a tree. "However, I wouldn't have to tell Principle Johnson such bad things about you if you just tell me who took the screws out and where the screws are".

"Umm well sir, I-I-I-I umm well".

"Spit it out girlie", Vernon yelled spraying her face with spit.

"Yes sir! Right away sir! It was-"

"Hahahahahaha"

They both turned to the supposing stoned boy behind Brianna. He was sitting there slowly laughing at them both.

"Hahahahahahahahahaha", Al continued.

"Alright dope head", Vernon said leaving Brianna and heading for Al," What's so funny? Did you take the screws from the door"?

"Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha!"

"ALRIGHT WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU"!

"He Doesn't really speak sir", Ben said without turning around," Surely sir, being the smart dapper young man that you are, you realized this after he has said nothing but ha ha ha".

"Save it Ben, I have plenty of dirt on you to keep you in here for the rest of your high school ,and maybe even collage if you make it that far, career".

"Bring it on _Emperor_", she said as she stood up, made a bow, then plopped back into her seat.

"That's it Ben! You have another week, want to go for some more?"

"Ben leaned back and put her hands behind her head and her feet on the table, "Sure why the hell not? According to sporto and pretty boy I don't have a life anyway, See ya next week captain Janitor Man Sir".

"If you feel so strongly about it then you now are going to be here for another two weeks".

"What did you say? All I heard was blah blah feel so blah blah blah then blah blah are going to be blah blah blah blah weeks, would you like to repeat it again or walk away with a quarter of a million dollars"

"That's three more weeks' smart ass"

Okay so you want to walk away is it"?

"Four more"

"Well you do whatever you want but we will miss you on WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIR!"

"Five, I could do this all day"

"Well if you can why do you want to leave?"

"Alright six, tired yet?"

"Oh I'm not even getting started"

"Seven"

"Hahahahahahhaahahhahahaha", came Al from across the room as he continued to stare out the window.

"That's one for you pot boy"

"Sir I don't mean to contradict you, but this is a little unfair and dumb", Brianna added her opinion.

"Oh ok miss smarty pants (lame comeback but its Vernon so what are ya gonna do?) That's one for you to, and just to be fair I think you two should also come back next week".He said as he pointed at Clark and Alex.

"WHAT!", their heads snapped around to look at him.

"Sir that's not fair we didn't do anything!"

"hmm sure you didn't, well I think you kids are having to much fun with me here, so Im going to go, DON'T ANY OF YOU SAY A WORD!"

Vernon walked over to the door, glanced back at them, then took a small folding table and put it in the door in an attempt to make it stay open.

"That won't work sir, the doors to heavy" Ben said in a sleepy voice.

"Shut up Ben", Clark hissed, "You'll get us all into even more trouble". Bens answer to this was sticking her tongue out at him.

After trying without success to get the door to stay open Vernon gave up and only yelled at them not to move or do anything stupid and he retreated to his, I mean, Principle Johnson's office. As soon as the door closed Ben got all of there attentions (even Al's) and began to tell them a plan.

"Alright pretty boys, jocks, dope heads, and nerds, listen up"

"Why should we listen to you"?

"It doesn't matter if you listen or not but I'm still gonna talk, alright we all know that Vernon is a stupid piece of crap that should be lit on fire and thrown onto someone's porch, The problem is, he doesn't know he is that, he thinks hes the president of the united states, lets make him remember what he really is", Ben said as she leaned over maliciously with a scheming look in her eyes.

**END O' CHAPTER 1**

**I'm sorry if anyone thinks that the "jokes" in this chapter are not funny but stupid, My bad I'm not a funny person.**

**Reviews**

Bejou- Congratulations Sammy-pants! You were the first to review, I'm sure all you want to say now is "IN YO FACE MIDGLEY". Thank you it is better than when you couldn't read it, and of course I know who you are cause you annoy me so damn much, jk. Yes you do sound like a teacher may you go to hell and roast marshmallows with me. O and also, you misspelled my name, its katherinE, toodles.

Panting Slightly- sigh thank you for that special little laugh midget. What do you mean when are thy going to start acting like the characters? they are aren't they? Keep reviewing, Out like an alcoholic at a bar.

Screaming666- Thank you I will keep writing if you keep reviewing.

Queen Red Rum- Yeah I thought it was a good idea to but I got it from my friend so I dont get all the credit. Ill keep writing if you keep reading and reviewing.

Gijinka Renamon- Thank you I think it's an interesting idea too. Yes I will continue.

**Ok to all the people reading this story, I'm going from NC to Canada soon so I wont get my third chapter up for a while. I'm sorry I should have considered YOUR feelings before I decided to go see my family, just kidding, so……..yeah………out like a skinny white boy in a rap contest-AngelinHell55**


	3. Rabid Squirrels and Moldy Socks

Gender Bender:

Chapter 3

Summery: What I think the Breakfast club would have been like with the genders switched, Allison: Al, Bender: Ben (nickname for girl named Benita), Claire: Clark, Andy: Alex, Brian: Brianna, Principle Vernon (I think that's his name) : Principle Johnson, Janitor Johnson: Janitor Vernon.

Disclaimer: Okay, I have good news and I have bad news. The bad news, is that I do not own the Breakfast Club. The good news is, I have invented my own world with my mind. And in my world (grins evily) there are Benders all over the place.

Authors Note: I am soooo sorry it's taken like over a year for me to get this up. Because I Want to get back on all your ahem "good" sides I wont write like a paragraph on why I couldn't get it up. Please don't hunt me down and kill me ( Midgley this goes especially to you!), I really hope you like this chapter cuzz I had it all written down in a notebook but then some assface at my school stole my notebook (on the subject, WHY THE HELL WOULD U STEAL A NOTEBOOK!!!!) so heh. Ps: writers block is such a bitch from hell !!!!!!!

smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."

Enter to 5 teens who look like they are about to seriously injure the closest person to them.

Alex was drawing a picture that on closer inspection, had a little stickman in a janitors outfit being tied down to the bottom of a tub with sharks biting it. In big bold letters next to it said "clean this, biotch".

Clark was sitting rigidly in is chair and staring straight ahead trying to ignore Ben. Ben was happily tipping her chair back and propping her feet on the table, looking around innocently. Every thirty seconds she would take out a yoyo and smack it against the back of Clark's increasingly black and blue head.

Brianna was sitting up straight in her chair and reading the dictionary. Every other minute she would quickly shove the book under the table with a guilty expression on her face and look at the now open door leading to Principle Johnson's office which was quickly tainted by Vernon.

Al was slumping in his chair with his head dropping down onto his chest and duck tape covering his mouth. A pile of odd things such as books, a baseball, a few pencils, and a CD player were scattered on his table and the floor around his seat. He was obviously knocked out.

The story behind his condition is……………..

The group had been trying to discuss ways to piss Vernon off, causing him to go crazy and try to kill them, thus getting him fired and hopefully put in jail. However every time they tried to say something, Al had started laughing maniacally. Finally the rest got fed up with this and took it upon themselves to shut him up. Unfortunately for Al they eventually got quite good at throwing things, which now explains Al's unconscious state and all the objects around him. Even though he was out cold he would laugh quietly at random moments. So the irritated teens had smacked him around a little and covered his mouth with duck tape. What wasn't visible was the old smelly gym sock Alex had pulled out of her bag and stuffed into his mouth under the duck tape. But amazingly, with the old crap sock, the duck tape, and his unconscious state, he still every couple minutes would let out small girlish giggles.

"I've got it!" Clark yelled, jumping up ecstatically. Everyone except the knocked out Al looked up at him. "We can train a team of maybe ten or fifteen rabid diseased squirrels to attack him, then take his unconscious body to the train tracks by the football field, and strap him to them, just like those old movies!".

DEAFENING SILENCE

Suddenly a yo-yo flew up and smacked Clark on his bruised head. He spun around clutching his head and glared at a laid back and whistling Ben. She looked at him, smiled sheepishly and shrugged. Then Alex stood up.

"Okay, let me explain the problems with that ahem _plan_". Clark pouted and slouched down in his seat. "First of all, training squirrels would take much more time than we thankfully have today, not to mention money. Second, if we KILL him, we go to jail and never have the satisfaction of humiliating and/or pissing him off.", she sighed and looked wearily at him, "and last of all, the rabid and diseased squirrels would no doubt lose control of themselves and bite all of us, and possibly the rest of the town. So basically, that idea was a complete waste of your few precious brain cells." She let out a huge breath and sat down with a smug smile.

"Brilliant deduction shitlock", Ben said with a bored tone, "I say we let the smart girl figure out how to take down Vernon, I'm too tired, your both too stupid, and our buddy over there is knocked out, fucked up, and completely crazy.

At being addressed, Brianna squeaked and blushed, looking timidly at the three students staring at her. "Oh I'm sorry, I couldn't possibly do a trick on mister Vernon, I could get in trouble!, I could get lunch detention, or even worse……………………actual detention!"

They stared at her and finally Ben spoke up, "ah my huge brained friend, you have yet to experience the wonders of pissing off the people you hate or are just slightly bored with, and anyways your already stuck at this extra special piece of hell on a Saturday, so I doubt they can do much worse to you."

"Except maybe suspend or expel you", Clark mumbled almost incoherently. Following his statement the yoyo popped back out again and with a resounding crack he was down on the floor crying.

Then when no one paid attention to his pitiful sobs and curled up fetal position he sat up sulkily and glared at Ben.

Suddenly a very conscious Al stood up.

"WAIT!", he screamed in a high-pitched voice, " I HAVE A PLAN!"

TO BE CONTINUED……

(MWAHAHAHAHAHA cough cough…………….HA!!)


End file.
